New is the hummingbird sun-catcher, hanging from the tree.
New is the hummingbird feeder, dangling near by.
New is this scene, just for a year, in a house in Santa Barbara,
where all the nature is new to my eyes.
Time in this house, with my three children, is ample,
Sometimes it feels a prison, I can’t get them out,
other times it feels a welcome hide-away,
with enough distractions to keep me from venturing out.
My days are quantified with small achievements;
children fed and hydrated, stories read,
music played, a dance and a song –
A painting, a drawing, a swim in the pool,
dishes are clean, clothes all washed and beds made.
If I think any further, have a place to be at a set time,
it all feels too much. Anxious tears spring in my eyes.
Phone calls go unanswered, responded with a text or an e-mail.
Shopping is left to do on-line, or by my husband on the way home from work.
I just have enough in me, each day, to focus on the little things.
For now, that is all I have and that is enough.
So the new hummingbird feeder in the garden draws my focus –
It’s significance is magnified by my simple days.
The sight of a bird, at the feeder or on a plant nearby,
flitting in the sunshine, with one purpose on its mind,
is my symbol of being in the moment, right now.
If I have to think past the moment, to the future, or question the past,
those tears spring again, and I feel down in my heart.
So now, in this New Year, I shall focus on what is now.
Right here, every day, new in the moment.
It is enough, for now.
© Sarah Lee, January 2014